| Things that might help when there is cancer in the family | Things that won’t help when there is cancer in the family |
|---|---|
| Yarning | Keeping things secret |
| Giving simple answers to questions | Giving lots of information and overloading kids |
| Letting kids yarn about difficult things | Trying to hush it all up, avoiding sad or hard information and telling kids not to talk about it with you or anyone |
| Telling kids getting cancer or getting sick is not their fault | Telling kids ‘be good for the grown ups’ and not to bother them |
| Listening to and talking with kids to hear how they are going and help them work out what they need | Trying to tell kids how they should feel or what they need, and trying to fix things for them |
| Agreeing on what needs to happen including jobs for family, around the home, yard and community | Giving orders, expecting too much of kids and not having play or family time together |
| Having a routine, rules and consequences | Letting go of structure, rules and discipline |
| Getting kids into sport and other community activities | Expecting kids to be home all the time, not talk to other people about what’s going on |
| Accepting help from others including with the kids | Thinking you can do everything on your own |
| Letting the school know | Not letting important people in your kids’ lives know, or telling kids to keep everything private |
| Letting the kids see that you might struggle sometimes but that you’ve got support | Acting as if everything is okay when maybe it's not |
Find out more about Talking to kids about cancer.
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